>Ruby is a little genius I swear. That girl is too smart for me sometimes. She has tapped into my weaknesses and exploits them every chance she gets.
For example. I have a really hard time with vomit. Not just like most people, where of course I don’t like it, and it makes me gag a little, or whatever. I mean like if someone throws up, I will, too. I can’t handle it. I guess I should take that as a sign that I should never have children.
Ruby has somehow become aware of my puke phobia and she takes advantage of it. Keep in mind the girl is FOUR YEARS OLD. If she doesn’t want to eat dinner, all of a sudden she feels like she has to throw up. If she doesn’t want to clean, she has to throw up. If she doesn’t want to go to bed, she has to throw up. And, since one time we had to pull over the car so that she could regurgitate purple and pink swirly Trix yogurt all over the Sam’s Club parking lot, she knows that I will give in to her every time because I am too damn scared that this may be the one time that she isn’t lying just to get out of doing something she doesn’t want to.
So, of course I feel like a total retard because when I was young I wasn’t clever enough to come up with that, and the one time that I did tell my parents that I didn’t want to eat tartar sauce because it would make me throw up I actually did throw up and they punished me for it like I forced myself to vomit.
Ruby is going to take over the world.