>Ban the banners

>I am so sick and tired of people thinking that they have the RIGHT not to be annoyed or uncomfortable, so they try to ban anything and everything they deem inappropriate or unnecessary. I am extremely annoyed at their arrogance, so I should be able to pass a law that bans them from being anywhere near me. In fact, why not ban them from becoming citizens at all. If you can’t beat the ban extravaganza, why not join it?

So, I decided that I want to ban something. Everyone else is doing it. I don’t want to be left behind. How can I possibly be hip and trendy if I don’t jump onto a banning bandwagon. How can I possible be an upstanding and moral person if I don’t speak out against something with absolutely no regard for the feelings of the people who are doing what annoys me. After all, I am protecting them, and protecting the CHILDREN. And even better, I can LEAD a banning bandwagon and be the lead banner. Oh, then my life will be complete.

So, I got to thinking… what can I ban… ? The use of fossil fuel because it pollutes the environment? Nah… I need my car to get to the store and buy my liquor and dead animals for my BBQ later. How about cell phone? People talking on c ell phones cause more and more car accidents every year. No, wait… I need my cell phone to call my sister and talk to her about body hair and men’s obsession with balls. Okay, so how about fast food? Obesity is a huge problem in our country and obesity related illness is now a leading cause of death. But wait, that would mean no more toaster sandwiches and onion rings from Sonic. Ixnay on the astfay oodfay anbay.

OH WAIT! I’VE GOT IT! I have finally found something to ban that doesn’t effect MY lifestyle whatsoever! Let’s ban RELIGION! Religion causes intolerance, bigotry, arrogance, racism, judgement, emotional distress, and even physical harm and death. Religious people talk down to me because I have pink hair and don’t worship Jesus. Religious zealots have burned other people (Salem), hang other people from trees and drug them from cars (KKK), cut off people’s heads (Middle East), forced million of people into gas chambers (Nazi Germany), taken over entire nations slaughtering masses of people (the Crusades), flown planes into buildings and killed people (WTC and Pentagon), bombed health clinics killling the women and babies they claim to be trying to save (anti-abortion activists bombing clinics), and beaten perfect strangers down in the streets and murder then in cold blood for not allowing the correct body part to come into contact with their own body part (hate crimes all over the US). Because of religion people can actually be denied the right to enter into a legal contract with someone else if at least one fo them doesn’t have a penis and the other one a vagina. Religious freaks actually build statues of people after they are killed by other religious freaks and put it them the middle of their hometowns with inscriptions like “This faggot is now burning in hell” on them. Religious people tell other people they are immoral and evil for committing muder while they push for the death penalty so they can murder the murderers. Religion causes a lot of grief. Why do we even still have it?

I say ban religion. Who cares if they have a right to practice religion. Who cares about all of those people who practice their faith peacefully, never imposing it on anyone else. Who cares about how they feel about being discriminated against because I am a big fat whiner who hates religion. WHO THE FUCK CARES?!?!?! I am annoyed, I don’t like it, IT HAS TO GO!

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3 thoughts on “>Ban the banners

  1. >I’m not anti-religion at all. If someone can find peace and comfort in religion and use their beliefs to better their lives, then awesome. I just can’t stand it when people force their beliefs onto other people, and then try to justify doing so by acting like they are protecting someone else, or even worse, because they have the right to and those in the minority have to deal with it because they are the minority. :PAnd yeah, no more Jello. How about we get rid of kool-aid while we are at it? It disguises itself as a healthy snack, all watery and fruit named, but all it is is liquid sugar just waiting to gel to our thighs.

  2. >I’m with you but only if we can ban jello too. It is evil. Just trust me. (and I don’t mean Jello Biafra, I’m talking the food substance). It just sits there, jiggling, plotting our demise.

  3. >You know…that idea is not half bad at all. I like it. I dont delve into the subject of religion very often cause of various reasons, but I respect what others believe in cause its not my business who or what they do/dont worship. I concur!

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